Toast crumbs

So, BJ and I just got home from our first Marriage Prep course, and it went fantastic! I will admit that I went in half-heartedly and didn't have the most open mind, but it wasn't as bad as I had psyched myself to believe. Actually, I learned a lot about our relationship, our faith, our love, our major issues, our fighting habits, and some ways to feel more connected.

The day started at 8 a.m. with some guest speakers. Regular couples would come in and tell their story (both happy and heartbreaking) and share what had worked and what had failed miserably in their relationships. It was very uncut and real and touching. One woman was reduced to tears as she told the class how a small squabble with her husband over shopping almost ended their relationship. She closed her speech with a story:

Her and her husband had 3 kids and worked full time jobs. The stress of day-to-day life got so overwhelming, they started focusing on what the other partner wasn't doing, instead of how much they did do. The woman said she would go into the kitchen after her husband had gone to work to find toast crumbs scattered on the countertop. She would argue with him at night, telling him that she hated cleaning them up, and that he should just use a plate to avoid the mess. The next day: more toast crumbs. The woman said it went on and on, and realized that since he wouldn't change, she needed to rethink how it made her feel. So, she started looking at it more lovingly. Every time she would see the toast crumbs, she would take a moment to be thankful that her husband was around to spend the night and be with her in the morning. The toast crumbs were no longer a nuissance, but a blessing. Awhile later, money had gotten tight, and he had to switch jobs to one that required him to be gone Monday-Thursday. She said that for a whole year, she mourned the loss of her toast crumbs.

So, be thankful for the time you have with people. Stop picking them apart, and just embrace them and their quirks. I know that I come with my fair share of toast crumbs, but I know that there is no crumb too big for BJ and me to overcome, as long as we stick together.

I'm taking a little break from my cleaning binge for a blog update! We are going to be out of town all weekend at the marriage course, and I need to get my apartment as tidy as possible for the babysitter!

Gav's last weight check showed that he was 14 lbs 11 ozs STILL! He's been the same size for almost 3 months now! We have him on a high-fat, high-cal diet, but it doesn't seem to be doing the trick. I have been scouring the web for some further tips, and got some great ideas that I can't wait to try! Our dietician told us to swap out his formula (he's on a high-cal Alimentum) and water for heavy whipping cream when we use it in his cereals, puddings, and even Jell-O! I saw online that some mom's had started using it in their mashed potatoes and pancakes for a boost, too. I also read some recipes for avocado/cream cheese sandwiches, high-fat grilled cheese, high-cal puree'd turkey, and a lot more!

West Central Education came today and we discussed future options like G-tubes and growth hormones. I NEVER want to see my baby hooked up to machines and wires again, but, at this point, I want some answers and results! In a few weeks, the three of us meet with Gav's neonatalagist and dietician for testing. Gav had Gastroschisis, but it doesn't firmly explain why he is having such a difficult time gaining weight now.

There's your insight on our daily struggles with the G-man... I'm gonna start testing recipes!

Much better...

So after my last rant on here, I thought I'd let everyone know that things have gotten better! I finally realized that the people that are so quick to judge and say hurtful things are just not worth the time. So they will receive none of mine! (Well, no more after this, I mean!)

Today was great! I subbed at the Area Learning Center in Melrose and took the kids bowling. Actually, they took me... Since the school doesn't have a gym, all of their physical education is done outside, if the weather permits. After so many days of kickball, the teachers started walking the Junior and Senior High kids down to Melrose Bowl. Today was the big day this week, and it just so happened that their normal gym teacher was absent! (She wasn't even the one I was supposed to be subbing for!) So, I took the kids and even though I wasn't able to get in on the game, it was a blast watching them have fun.

This weekend is the dreaded marriage course in St. Cloud. I'm not worried about the class, but about missing my beautiful little man, Gavin, all day!! Two days in a row without my tiny stud is going to be Hell.... I'm just looking forward to coming back and getting some Gav-ttention... :)

The agenda for this evening, you ask?
*Eat some dinner with my boys
*Listen to the CD for the marriage course and fill out study guide
*Clean this place up! West Central Education tomorrow!!
*Run on the treadmill
*Finish the order for the invitations
*Fill out job application at the hospital
*Take my sleepy butt to bed!!!!

Alas, the morning will come too soon...

Time for a change?

This is a blog of frustration. In recent events, I have been encouraged by many people to change. In my own defense (because those people that one would expect to stand up for me have totally done the reverse and attacked me.. but mostly behind my back) I am saying "HELL NO!" If you really don't like me, my attitude, personality, or anything else, then stay away from me. So, stay away from me if all you have to offer is your judgement and negativity. You have absolutely no idea where I came from or how my attitude has gotten me through situations. Don't try to drag me down in your attempts to be perfect. I am content being outspoken, feisty, a bit hard to swallow, and very opinionated. I am not changing.

Little buddies!

The boys and I took a little trip to Minneapolis to visit Carmen and Caleb, who are staying at the U of M Children's Hospital. Our little guys haven't seen each other in almost a year, and it was great to see them check each other out. We put the boys next to each other for some pictures, and they took turns playing with each others' faces and hands.

Afterwards, Carmen's husband, Shane, and their other 3 children met us at the hospital (after their 3 hour drive up) and we all went out for some pizza. It was so great seeing them again! Even though we met under some pretty scary circumstances, we are so fortunate to have them in our lives. Now that Carmen and Caleb are back in the cities, we can hopefully get together more often (Since Gav and I don't have too much going on during the days now). Thanks for everything, Sybesma family! We can't wait for our next visit!

P.S. In my last blog, I said that Caleb needed a liver... He needs a KIDNEY!!!! (Sorry, Carmen!!!! I'm way more knowledgeable about intestines....)